Pet Peeves?

mauserwerke · Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2005 4:03 pm Post subject:

How did this turn into such a big debate? 'eh?

Some people are comfortable walking on graves. Some aren't. Period. That's it. No "shoulds" or "should nots" about what others should do. if you feel comfortable walking on a grave, hey, boogie on down. Dance

If you are uncomfortable doing it or choose to refrain from doing it as far as you aware, then do it. We're talking about personal pet peeves here, not big theological issues.

BTW, the only pet peeve I'd really have is silly people who see you in a cemetery and they come to find out what's going on and they think its all a big joke.

Beth M
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scarfyrre · Orb Joined: Jan 13, 2005 Posts: 93 Location: Alpharetta

Just seemed like sharing our opinions and why. If someone wishes to walk among the departed and not step on a grave, then that's how they want to do things. Personally, I don't think it's disrespectful to stand, walk, or sit on a grave as long as it's done with love. If I can share my feelings, ideas, and knowledge of cemeteries so that another person might stop feeling so scared of doing the very thing we're supposed to do, then I feel better. If not, then it doesn't bother me.

Certainly, I don't go skipping around. When I walk it is with respect and love. And from a practical side, it's practically impossible to not walk on a grave at Old Roswell.

I guess what I'm trying to convey is respect is one thing, but the way some dance around, dodging graves in a 200+ year old cemetery is unneccessary. I think it's much more respectful to walk quietly sharing thoughts with the dead, and not spending the whole time worrying if someone is being insulted.

Know what I mean? If that's your thing, then have at it, but please don't look down at me if I go read a stone and step on a grave. I have yet have a spirit tell me to get off. Smile

Pity I can't express myself better. I'd love to explain my feelings better. Anyway, peace, I don't think there's a debate, but a sharing of ideas, eh? Flowers

Wackywizjr · Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2005 11:09 pm Post subject:

ThisBodiesLife · Mist Joined: Nov 08, 2004 Posts: 174

hoot_n_howl · Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2005 9:37 pm Post subject: Pet Peeves: Walking on Graves

Im new here. I personally try not to walk on graves if at all possible, but it is a respect issue. Most people are respectful when they walk thru a cemetary; However, when I lived in CA, I knew of people who liked to sneak into cemetaries at night to get drunk or high and then would go laughing and stumbling over grave markers as they left. A few would take headstones to decorate their bedrooms. Frankly, I find that offensive and disrespectful. The point is that it is a place where loved ones are laid to rest and their memories honored and our behavior should reflect as much. Of course sometimes there is no getting around stepping on markers. I basically think of how I would want the resting place of my loved one treated and use that as a guideline for my behavior.

Angji · Posted: Mon Jun 20, 2005 4:34 pm Post subject:

HI al I was not sure on it so I say Im sorry. I talk to them I ask permission to touch there graves per take pictures I feel odd so better save than sorry I ay I'm sorry when I do explain why it is hard for me to not stop n it.
I just talk to them and say hi...
I personally want obe either frozen or cremated it don't matter.
I love for people to be sad for me but also to be happy for me and to say prayers party have a god te just don't forget me is all Iam asking :)
When my son passed away very young I through his ashes with a flower and a prayer over thre riverandwent down there occassonally with offersing of food and drink for him and that is it :)
I thought it was alot bettter memorial that rotting in the dirt but to each there own.
Well that it :)
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Heidi · Posted: Mon Jun 20, 2005 11:42 pm Post subject:

interesting subject...

I pretty much agree as far as the pet peeve. Mostly its just disrespectful people that is my peeve,like people suggesting taking something from a site or hunt as a souvenir,etc- to me thats just not good ' huntettique..'.

not that we cant enjoy the hunt and always be "dead serious" ( no pun intended..lol) But certain rules and respect should apply as always.

This was an interesting topic with wonderful posts!
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wingedguy · Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 8:33 am Post subject:

we all pretty much agree that respect is the ideal way to enter the cemetary-respect for the deceased as well as for the loved one.

interestingly enough is the topic of stepping and no stepping. do you, or don't you?!

everyone regards stepping with a show of respect; but other important regards are often ignored. I have seen people out on the grave trying to portray a semblance of respect by where they step, yet they will talk "trash" about and around the grave. "Over there is buried that old woman -she was such a b@#$*!" or "I hated that old b@#$%^&! -he was so mean!" or "thank God, he's dead now!" some of the things said of the deceased are just rude!

I don't believe that spirits are complete prudes -in fact some have shown to have a sense of humor and have even responded to jokes in the field with the like. I do believe that those spirits who linger hear what is said around them.

also, the "resting place" sometimes becomes the trash desposit for twinkie wrappers, empty coke cans, or worse yet, discarded cigarette butts! go to any cemetary and you will find flicked butts all around!

I have seen "pampered biotches" come to visit the grave of their third husbands with their lap poodles, and then let these skiddish little puffballs run around, lift their leg, and tinkle on the headstones! no regard for proper restraint of the pet is taken, and certainly no regard for what "precious" is doing in addressed.

to me, a living being, these are FAR more offensive than whether someone walks on my grass. I can guess this holds the same for those who have passed.

who really wants dog pee, twinkie wrappers, and cigarette butts to be the respect shown to their soul after they have passed?!
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Wackywizjr · Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2005 6:30 am Post subject:

Agreed, respect is an as you would like yourself to be treated thing.

Always look at what you are doing and think, Would I want someone to do this in my final resting place...
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chris · Orb Joined: Feb 11, 2004 Posts: 53 Location: Duluth, GA

Third time trying to post, LOL.

I haven't been on a hunt yet, but hate when I read about or see investigations that have to end because a "sensitive" just can't take all of the negative energy and gets possessed or something. I think that sometimes it may be real, sometimes not. But even so, everyone knows when they feel that they are in danger. Time to let the other investigators know and remove yourself from the situation.

I think sometimes people who do this are a little histrionic and seek attention.

Feedback??

chris · Orb Joined: Feb 11, 2004 Posts: 53 Location: Duluth, GA

OK, part two of things that irritate me about some investigations...

I can't stand it when certain investigation groups look to religious answers as a cure-all for hauntings. I have read some investigators as saying that they got the family (who was haunted) going to church and blessed the house, and that things should be better now....That is their answer in every case!!

If that were always the case there would never have been a Borely Rectory.

I know I am not speaking from experience here, but these things irritate me.

I hope I haven't offended anyone.
Clown

Wackywizjr · Posted: Sat Jun 25, 2005 10:13 am Post subject:

No offence taken

As for leaving an investigation I can understand this part. I am highly sensative in a very unusual way, and there are times when the things I see can disturb me enough that I get physicaly ill. On 2 ocasions I have been bad enough to have to walk out.

The religion thing I will stay out of, I don't like to argue on those lines sorry.
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chris · Orb Joined: Feb 11, 2004 Posts: 53 Location: Duluth, GA

Thanks for the input.

My point here is, that if you are gonna get so under the weather during an investigation -- leave it. I am glad that you replied and said "I leave" if I feel this way,

I DO believe that some people are more affected by paranormal experiences than others, eg. sensitive.

But I get irrritated to see peeps that are fine, then all of a sudden posssesed - too extreme, even silly.

Glad that you shared on this subject, Wacky.

hoot_n_howl · Posted: Sun Jul 10, 2005 10:33 am Post subject:

An investigation is a group effort. If someone is feeling so overwhelmed that it is becoming disruptive and is hindering the investigation, I think the courteous things to do would be for them to leave the area, until they felt they could continue in a manner that wouldnt interfer with any observations or data being recorded.

Heidi · Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 12:59 am Post subject:

I agree hootnhowl...I have hunted once somewhere where I felt comfortable but later one person got a feeling of not being wanted there, and decided to leave, I respected that. I too have even left a place when I didnt feel wanted there by something.
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Your lost friends are not dead, but gone before, advanced a stage or two upon that road which you must travel in the steps they trod.

gspceo253 · Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 7:16 am Post subject:

I just wanted to pitch my 2 cents in here. I've been on hunts where I just felt too uncomfortable or just too queasy to continue. As a sensitive, I've felt fine, but then get a little overwhelmed with what I'm feeling and I either continue on or back off a bit. On one occasion, I didn't get good feelings and remained outside during an indoor hunt. That's not to say that I didn't go back in when I felt better.
I can also say that at least this group is respectful as far as desecrating graves and headstones. I passed a cemetary yesterday on the way to another funeral and was told by my husband that there was a grave in there where the grass was all burned up. He said that all the grass around it was fine but the grass on the grave itself was burned up. I was intrigued at this and asked why this was so. My husband said that it was because people were urinating on this man's grave. He wronged lots of people in town and when he got caught stealing millions of dollars from him, he committed suicide instead of facing the court system. People in our county hate him so much that the family asked for the body to be buried away from everyone else. You can see how much people respect this man even after he's dead.
As for stepping on graves, I try not to step on them, but if it's crowded and I can't help it, I apologize for it. This is just me though.

PaimpontOak · Orb Joined: Jun 02, 2005 Posts: 23

Chris wrote:

“I haven't been on a hunt yet, but hate when I read about or see investigations that have to end because a "sensitive" just can't take all of the negative energy and gets possessed or something. I think that sometimes it may be real, sometimes not. But even so, everyone knows when they feel that they are in danger. Time to let the other investigators know and remove yourself from the situation.

I think sometimes people who do this are a little histrionic and seek attention.”

Excellent topic: the drama queens and kings!

This has always been a PEEVE of mine. I’ve seen far too many people, as I guess they’re called in here, “sensitives”, who always seem to get “possessed” or hysterical in one way or another. It’s almost always the same individuals, as well.

I know, who are any of us to say that what’s happening to them isn’t real? It’s unfortunate though that often it’s always the same song and dance and most people are very poor actors.

Now, I’ll admit that there are (or were) times when I have been shaken up by something, a presence, a mist, a perceived voice, but I try to keep it in perspective. If I honestly feel something coming on, I keep myself under control and try to rationalize the sensation; am I actually picking up on energy or am I just plain freaked out?

Oddly enough, that’s how most of my friends knew I was feeling something, because I would just clam up.

But I digress…

Short of bringing a portable EEG scanner and hooking it up to everyone “acting” possessed, all we can really do is go with our guts on these instances.

Quick example: Someone who came with us a few times started acting like this and we all knew it was nothing but drama. We ignored it and would just walk away. They eventually got the picture and the drama stopped.

mae-bea · Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2005 7:35 am Post subject:

I know this is a very old thread , but something just came to me while reading some of these . My Grandmother used to take me to the cemetary when I was little . She never allowed us to walk on the actually grave . I remember why now . Old graves have wooden caskets in them and over time these rot and leave an empty space under the topsoil . She was always afraid we'd fall in . I have been to very old graveyards and seen where the grave has actually caved in some . So , it could actually be dangerous , especially at night .
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WeirdChill · Orb Joined: Jul 14, 2005 Posts: 83

My largest Pet Peeve is people showing up not knowing how to use their equipment. When you buy new equipment, you should take the time to learn how to use it before taking it out in the field.

Mysti · Orb Joined: Sep 28, 2005 Posts: 30 Location: Iowa

Loud people, or large groups that constantly talk and disrupt your attempts at capturing EVP, and as WeirdChill stated, people who don't know how to use the equipment.

mels9rs · Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2005 2:45 pm Post subject:

I guess mine would be not respecting other investigators while they are trying to take pics or get EVPs and such. Also, people who take themselves too seriously as far as "being the one there that knows what's happening", like sort of looking down your nose at others who might sense something ot think they saw/heard something, etc...there are some psychics, sensitives, investigators who, I do believe, are definitely gifted! I've seen some people on tv who act like they are the all-knowing and probrably wouldn't take anyone else's experiences seriously...and even the least sensitive of us have good input!!! I've lucked out so far and have had nothing but great experiences with others on investigations/hunts!!! Dance

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Flood · Orb Joined: Nov 02, 2005 Posts: 13 Location: New Zealand

I've only had a quick flick through here, but I've got to say that I'm very happy that so many people have respect tempered with their curiousity.

I'm personally the kind of person that gets a little annoyed when people yell or run around areas where the dead are buried or where ashes lie. To me they are supposed to be places of rest and reflection. I am particularly disgusted when I see headstones or graves that have been defaced. Crying or Very sad

I also get a bit annoyed when people aren't careful enough about the spirit world (it is another "world" to ours, mostly invisible and unknown to us, and as we don't know how it works, it is better to err on the side of caution at all times), or if people utterly debunk the unexplained. Just because you can't SEE something doesn't mean it's not there. And I always think it's better to keep an open mind (even if you are like me and have set beliefs), as then you can grow and make educated decisions.

Just my 50 cents.